What Are Your "Fundamental" Differences?

First let me warn you... I had a terribly horrific day at work. Fridays are not supposed to be this hard. I'm also hopped up on Red Bull, plus I watched the first Presidential debate tonight...and for anyone who really knows me, this is not a good combination toward making a happy me.

I'm stressed and frustrated and haven't been sleeping well this past week. The state of economy, the current Presidential race, and a myriad of other things, have been haunting my dreams...

So...what did you think of the debate? Personally, it fell short of my expectations. I'm a Obama supporter, and although he had a good showing this evening, he wasn't 100% on his game. Fortunately, it doesn't take all of him to make McCain look inadequate...he does it pretty well, all on his own. The fact that he didn't know that his OWN advisor (Henry Kissinger had supported "talks" with Iran, and adamently contested Obama's assertion that he never said it...was ludicrous). I of course Googled the topic and in less than 10 seconds found an article published on the New York Times website, validating Obama's claim! DUH!!!!

The scariest part of this whole process is not knowing the final outcome.

Anything in life that really truly matters is never simplistic in nature...and it's a prime example of something so important that needs to have a positive end result. The not knowing...the waiting...the ever-racing ideas and scenarios have been running rampant through my fragile mind.

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So onto another topic. As time marches on, I'm learning, though not yet at the point of accepting, that the only person I can change or control is me. I've been under some stress at work lately...and it's due in large part to the actions of others. Okay wait. I have to stop myself right there. I'm allowing the actions of others to dictate my mood. It has to stop...for my wellbeing. I'm one to take on all the muck of the world as my own and it isn't healthy. It makes me cranky and tense and stressed and aggravated and on and on. That's not the true me.

This weekend....well actually only tomorrow...because I do have to spend all of Sunday working, I'm going to try to tune it out. I'm taking the day to go out to lunch with my mom, followed by a little retail (shoes) therapy. Later on, I fully plan on parking myself (in my most comfy jammies) on the couch...and will hopefully watch some type of mindless marathon of non-reality.

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I've been meaning to write all week, hence the extended blog. Frankly, I just didn't have enough mental energy to put my thoughts down until now. Speaking of "reality," I'm going to have to admit one of my most deepest and darkest secrets. I'm a reality-TV junky of sorts. I was WAY into 'Meet The Barkers' for its three-season run on MTV. For some reason, the lives of Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler and their not-so-knit-together family...enthralled me. If you don't already know, when you get sucked into this type of somewhat real-somewhat staged dramedy, you begin to feel like you know the players. So when I heard about the plane crash that badly burned Travis Barker and DJ AM and killed four other people...it struck a chord.

What touched me the most, was Shanna Moakler's reaction to the accident. She did not hesitate to hop the next plane to Georgia to be by Travis Barker's beside. Although their relationship, played out in the public eye for all the world to see, has been rocky at best...wow.

It also made me think a lot about how easily life can change in a few short minutes. We should all take a moment and be reflective...be grateful for all that we have, and above all, the people in our lives who make it all the better.

Over the past few months I've begun to truly recognize how fortunate I am....fortunate to have SO MANY absolutely AMAZING people in my life. My circle of friends and family is expansive...and is the key that unlocks the door to all that's purely genuine and good in my life.

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One more thought before I sign off tonight...
I have watched all but one season of E.R. (didn't watch last season. I was pissed about the story line with Dr. Abby Lockhart and boycotted it)...nonetheless since it's the last season, I decided to return to revel in the drama...and for the hope that I'd get one last glimpse of Mr. George Clooney in the role that made me drool...I mean watch the show religiously. BAD MOVE!~!! They killed off Mekhi Pfeiffer's role...Dr. Greg Pratt on the SEASON PREMIERE!!! Instead of enjoying my night, I sat there sobbing like a baby over someone who isn't even a real person!!:)

How many more people can they kill off before the show ends? I mean really. Dr. Mark Green and his brain tumor. The angry doctor who first loses his arm and than gets killed by a runaway helicopter. Neela's soldier husband and former ER doc...blown up by an IED in Iraq. Ray got hit by a bus and loses both his legs. Dr. Anspaugh's son. Dr. Carter's baby. Kovac's whole family. Did I miss anybody? Yikes!